From Working to Stay-At-Home Mom & Back Again

Written by: Elise Jaffe

In just 10 short months I’ve gone from being a full time mom, to a part time mom to a full time mom to a full time working woman. 

Years ago, when having a child was just a hypothetical, I used to think I could never be a stay at home mom.  I’ve always been obsessed with my career and loved to work. Even when I met my husband I made it quite clear that I would love to have a househusband one day.  He knows about my dream of coming home on the train only to find him, with a stroller and even a dog waiting for me at the station.  It was kind of a joke to us for while, until I was pregnant and reality set in.

I suddenly fell in love with the idea of staying home part time with my future baby. When Carmen was born I took 7 weeks of maternity leave…well, sort of, when you own your own business I guess you’re never really “off” – in fact, I even did some work from my hospital bed the day after she was born.  I then went back to work 2 days a week and found myself to be quite productive on those days. 

I put Carmen on a few daycare waitlists figuring by the time she was 6 months or so, that would be great for her socially.  Then our nanny quit because she needed full time work and none of the daycares came through.  I decided to test my luck at being a full time mom to a 6 month old, much harder than a newborn – at least in my eyes. 

While I enjoyed many of my hours with her I just felt as though I wasn’t that good at the job.  While others praised me for my juggling act and I found myself better at the job then I expected I still felt I was letting myself and my baby down.  And then 3 months later, the call came- a full time spot in my 1st choice daycare.  I was thrilled and then my heart sank – would I ever be as close to my child again?  

It’s only been 2 weeks and I have to say, I should have trusted my instincts from the beginning.  While I miss sharing every moment with her, I know this is the situation that we were meant to be in.  I feel I am a better mom, I value all my moments with her and I love being able to fully focus on my work again.  I can’t wait to get her at the end of the day and melt when I see her bounce up and down when I walk in the room.

Every woman is different and we really need to just trust our instincts.  I’m lucky I had the ability to test out every situation and find that what I thought was right for me all along, really was!   

Posted on July 01, 2012 at 2:44 PM